finally my internet is working again! this is pleasing. i havent been able to blog, or read any other peoples blog posts, its been a nightmare! But alas, i am back on here, typing away, telling you all how im feeling, what im up to, and other stuff.
so, i had a meeting with my psychiatrist the other day, and i found out im getting a care co-ordinator. this person should visit me once or twice a week and help me do stuff……socially. my anxiety is terrible at the moment, however i did manage to go out on friday to ‘the shop’, where i feel comfortable, i was still anxious, but not half as bad as i thought i’d be. i also went over a family members house which was good, and i did some work on my sisters allotment. busy busy busy! all very anxious moments though.
unfortunately with anxiety comes boredom. you want to go out, but you dont want to at the same time, so you’re stuck indoors most of the time, mainly doing nothing. add depression into this and you have no get up and go, but at the same time wish you were doing something to better yourself. so, i have been bored, and i hate being bored.
overall, life is still very difficult for me, however, my suicidial thoughts have subsided, and my hallucinations have as well. paranoia is still a big part in my mind at the moment, and i cant help but make scenarios in my head either of bad things that could happen.
what i would like to say as well i thank you. thank you people who read my blog, i really do appreciate it, and i know just how far around the world it gets. thank you everyone.