CPN, EEG, and a big change (probably)

well, i had a meeting today with a CPN (im pretty sure it stands for community psychiatric nurse) and someone else with him them, someone who was observing. it went alright. they said the same thing all medical people say ‘you have a very good understanding of your illness’. i know i do, ive had it for over 20 years. i dont say that to people, but yeh, i know i do. i think its important for me to know as much as possible about whats going on with me. its important for me to connect dots when it comes to it. if i recognize something happens when something else happens i can quickly relate the two, simple really. i dont wait for other people to study me to tell me whats going on, im the most important person when it comes to people knowing whats wrong with me, i even know what helps me when it comes to almost all things. again, joining the dots. sometimes what i need doesnt happen and then im stuffed, i will try my hardest to get it to happen, but sometimes its out of my control. we did talk about a lot of things in the meeting, PIP, EEG, inside my thoughts, medication, therapy, my life situation, and many other things. i wont go into detail on all of those, but we talked for a while.

so, the EEG im going to have is going to look at my whole brain when it goes ahead. im pleased with this because i think a lot of it needs looking at. there is a lot wrong with it in a lot of parts of it, so having a good gander at it all will probably help me and others. hopefully they can see whats going on with the issues talked about the previous blog post.

i tried to thank a couple of people today with some things i sent them. i just wanted to show my appreciation to a couple of people, one for their help the last few days, and the other for keeping me sane when i really shouldnt have been in the last few months. i hope what i did was enough to say thank you.

i have my meeting for volunteering tomorrow. im a bit nervous about it. i dont know how it will go. i know the place i am going for it, i know people who work for the organisation, and i know in great detail what the volunteering will entail as ive done it quite a lot before. im just worried that perhaps they wont let me join for some reason, or that the person whos seeing me doesnt like me. i will see tomorrow obviously. im hoping they have a place for me.

i would also like to thank the person who reminds me that i can get away and there is a place i can go to if it all gets on top of me. North Yorkshire worked recently and im sure it will again. need to give myself time between though, so its still really special to me.

you will possibly see a difference in my blog posts soon, there is something i think im going to have to do, i dont like it but i will probably do it to better a few things.

right, im off

hope the rest of your week is great!

buh bye!

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