Sometimes my mind is more challenging than it usually is, and I’ve been in this situation for the last month, and do you know what….. I’m proud of myself. Here’s why.

I’ve been doing quite well in the last month. I’m now pretty sure that October hit me half way through September. I usually suffer in October but I started to struggle earlier this year. Sure, like I say, I’ve been struggling but I have dealt with it all so incredibly well. I’ve been depressed, anxious, and paranoid. I’ve also hallucinated in 3 different ways, and on several occasions, but what I have done is be in control. I haven’t let it get on top of me, I haven’t been put in horrible situations and I’ve been able to relax, relatively speaking.

I am back to running, back on my diet (I gained half a stone), and I’ve got out of the house a couple of times. I am scared dishes up but managed to do it the other day. I’m getting back to normal and hope I can carry on this way, or better!

I’m cautious about the next couple of weeks. I need to make sure I can get over any hurdles placed in front of me. I need to remember the last four weeks and learn from them. I think there is a lot to be learnt from this experience, more to learn from this one then, perhaps, a bad experience. I’ll be able to use this experience many more times, I hope.

I saw my therapist and they said there is a shift going on in mental health care at the moment. The aim is to move further towards acceptance of a situation and moving past it rather than try to fight a problem off. I think I have accomplished this by myself in the last month. I understand this method more, its more comfortable for me. I feel like if this works I could advocate it. I’ll see how things go.


One thought on “Fighter!

  1. You feel messed up in October because the veil between the worlds is thinner, and I should know because I get like that too but this has truly been the most mellow and quiet October of my life. I mean, just quiet. I love Lamictal for that.


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