So it probably isn’t a surprise when I say that my mental health hasn’t been that great the last couple of weeks.
I’m panicking at the moment that my bad mental health could be driving people away from me. I’ve lost enough friends and family from this sort of thing, so it wouldn’t be a surprise if this is what’s happening right now. I don’t think people can cope with me when I’m not well. I don’t think I’m a nasty person when I’m not well but I do know I can be a little more intense, or I will start hiding behind some cocky arrogant mask. I just become the opposite of the person I actually am. This can send people packing. Either person makes people uncomfortable.
I’ve had a few days away to recuperate but it hasn’t really worked. It instead made me get a cold. I do think that when my mental health worsens, my physical health follows quickly behind. Now I have a cold and it sucks!
I did just eat a whole carton of custard, so now I feel a little better. I’m having to use some material items to make myself feel better right now. A good sleep might help me.
I suppose my psychosis isn’t too bad at the moment. It’s everyday psychosis. I’m just rolling in some paranoia. At least I can recognise it for the most part. I might have some paranoia I’m not recognising as an issue. This can happen quite a lot. oh well.