being overwhelmed is always an uncomfortable feeling. I sit there overthinking the world, overthinking myself, and overthinking every single moment. I get caught up in negative words, negative voices, paranoid thoughts, and thoughts of doom and gloom. There's not really any action that has given me reason to be feel this way, no reason other … Continue reading Fighting My All-Consuming Thoughts.
My CPNs, therapists, psychologists and doctors have never really talked about my schizophrenia when I ever bought it up. Yes, they were happy to diagnose me with it, they were happy to acknowledge it but they were never happy to help me with it. It almost felt like they were all stumped when it came … Continue reading The “Professionals” Of Schizophrenia
I've been feeling guilty for the past few days. I've been struggling with my mental health for a little while now, a little more than usual, and I decided to ignore this issue in the hope that it would go away. It didn't go away, in fact it got worse. Now I cant be the … Continue reading Seeing My Illness written Down, And The Downslide Caused By The DWP System.
Sometimes I sit here and think about my past mental health problems. I often think about those times where things were really difficult, and they are really vivid memories. I thought i'd write about three different times when psychotic delusions have been dangerous for my health, and sometimes dangerous for my life 1. I once … Continue reading My Psychotic Delusions.
So for the last few days I've been telling myself its okay to be a bit lost. I've been losing sight of the direction my life is going in and its a bit annoying. I'm getting caught up in the wildness of my mind telling me that things aren't going to plan, that i'm a … Continue reading Magic mind.
At the end of 2018 and into the beginning of 2019 I said the cliched words "this is my year", and I really meant these words. It's a month into the year and things are really going my way, and I don't think its luck. See, I made a plan for January. My plan was … Continue reading Schizo-affective and succeeding!
So it probably isn't a surprise when I say that my mental health hasn't been that great the last couple of weeks. I'm panicking at the moment that my bad mental health could be driving people away from me. I've lost enough friends and family from this sort of thing, so it wouldn't be a … Continue reading Bad Days and Custard.
I'm having one of those days. One of those days where it feels like I'm not on meds (medication) and I've got all my problems. I can easily remember this feeling because its one i really don't like. I feel like everything is bad. Everything is frustrating, incoherent to me, and all my thoughts are … Continue reading When your mental illness reminds you it’s still there.
I'm currently thinking about some stuff that could potentially change my future. These questions could change the darker side of me. They could change the instability in my emotion. They could potentially heal some pretty hefty wounds on my mind. I could possibly be at the beginning of something huge for me. I talked to … Continue reading I don’t believe in fairies.
There are different ways of knowing if your mental illness is causing problems. Well I know of a few different ways. Spotting these different ways has become an art-form for me over the last few years. Something happens within yourself and you start to question whether it relates to ill mental health. I started to … Continue reading It’s more than “in your head”